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Quiet in Chaos

a blog by Anne Marie Hawke

The Fairest Flower

9/27/2020

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“Your word is a lamp for my feet, and a light on my path.” (Psalm 119:105 NIV)

“The entrance of Your words gives light; it gives understanding to the simple.” (Psalm 119:130 NIV)

“Death and life are in the power of the tongue: and they that love it will eat the fruit thereof.” (Proverbs 18:21 KJV)
 
God created the earth and the heavens with His word.  An author crafts words into destinations we can go to in our minds.  A journalist uses words to give us the facts of world events.  We use words spoken and unspoken to relay our hearts, our emotions, our very selves with others.  “…For out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks.” (Matthew 12:34) Our words flow with the tides of our heart. 

At times my heart has been a tumultuous sea and my words followed suit, bringing waves of hurt,  pain, and the endless sand of distrust and distance.   At times my heart has been a quiet bay, a place of refuge for the weary, encouragement to the dry and thirsty soul.  We all have known the damage of words, and we have all known the healing of words.  Our words are powerful.  

I think the sweetest words I have ever heard are the words that brought me home; "Behold, God is my salvation; I will trust, and not be afraid: for the Lord JEHOVAH is my strength and my song; he also has become my salvation." (Isaiah 12:2)  "Fear not; for I am with you: be not dismayed; for I am your God: I will strengthen you; yes, I will help you; yes, I will uphold you with the right hand of my righteousness."  "The Lord is gracious, and full of compassion; slow to anger, and of great mercy." (Psalm 145:8)  And Colossians 1:13-22; "Who has delivered us from the power of darkness, and has translated us into the kingdom of His dear Son; in whom we have redemption through His blood, even the forgiveness of sins: who is the image of the invisible God, the firstborn of every creature: for by Him were all things created, that are in heaven, and that are in earth, visible and invisible, whether they be thrones, or dominions, or principalities, or powers: all things were created by Him, and for Him: and He is before all things, and by Him all things consist.  And He is the head of the body, the church: who is the beginning, the firstborn from the dead; that in all things He might have the preeminence. For it pleased the Father that in Him should all fullness dwell; and having made peace through the blood of His cross, by Him to reconcile all things unto Himself; by Him, I say, whether they be things in earth, or things in heaven.  And you, that were sometimes alienated in your mind by wicked works, yet now has He reconciled in the body of His flesh through death, to present you holy and unblameable and unreproveable in His sight:..."

His is the sweetest voice I have ever heard, and the only one that truly matters.  So if you are listening to other voices: the voice of doubt, the voice of fear, the voice of insecurity, the voice of depression, the voice of accusation, the voice of self-loathing, the voice of guilt and shame, the voice of confusion, the voice of destruction, the voice of unforgiveness...I encourage you to silence them with the truth of what God says about you, your situation, your circumstances, your life and anything and everything that has to do with you.  Let Him have the final say.  


                                                                  The Fairest Flower

I looked across a barren field
As far as my eyes could see
Nothing living only death
Depiction of the depths of me
 
“Get up, walk the barren way,”
A voice spoke from behind
As I stepped upon the ground
Words like water filled my mind
 
“No good, less than, not enough,
Abandoned, rejected, alone
Despicable, worthless, unwanted.”
Seeds that had been sown
 
Each one had been planted
Each one had taken root
I claimed this barren field
Where nothing yielded fruit
 
Each step was torturous
Each step I yearned for reprieve
Words and thoughts like weapons
Struck against my deepest need
 
Halfway through the field
Something began to shift
Everywhere my feet had stepped
Vanished: Ceased to exist
 
In its place the fairest flower
White, fragile, and soft
“These, child, are the petals,
Of all that has been lost.”
 
“Take them in your hand now,
Then take another step ahead,
And you will see that I bring
Life where there was only death.”
 
I picked the precious petals
Turning, made another stride
There at my feet blooming
The hope I thought had died
 
Other words began to form
As I looked upon the ground
“Beloved, accepted, dearly loved,
Once lost but now found.”
 
“I have made you,
Knew you before you were born,
The words that others planted,
Those seeds will grow no more.”
 
“Hear the words that I say,
Hear and you will live,
No weapon formed will prosper,
As you have received, freely give…”



​
Written by Anne Marie Hawke
September 2020

To find out more about my writing or to subscribe to my blog, please visit my website at hawkewriter.com
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Fountain Of Life

9/12/2020

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“For with You is the fountain of life; in Your light do we see light.” (Psalm 36:9 AMP)
 
I love water.  I always have.  If there was a stream, pond, river, or a puddle around when I was a kid, I was in it, and it's pretty much the same way now as an adult!  I adore the ocean; hearing it, seeing it, swimming in it, sitting on the shore watching it…it reminds me of the vastness of God, it reminds me of His power, it reminds me of His oceanic love for me.  That God depicts Himself through water touches the deepest part of my heart, ‘for with Him is the fountain of life.’ 

A fountain in Bible times was “a natural source of living water.  These fountains, bright sparkling ‘eyes’ of the desert, are remarkable for their abundance and their beauty, especially on the west of Jordan.  All of the perennial rivers and streams of the country are supplied from fountains and depend comparatively little on surface water.” (BibleStudyTools.com) Today when we think about a fountain, we think of a water fountain to get a drink on a hot day, or we think of a man-made fountain in a park or our back yard, but when David says, ‘with thee is the fountain of life,’ he means it in the context of what he was familiar with, and therefore was saying that God is the never ending, pure, inexhaustible, beautiful life-giving fountain.   

He is the fountain that will never run dry.  He is the fountain that washes away all the stain and residue that sin and brokenness cause.  He is the fountain that floods a dry, thirsty soul with the life-giving water of His grace and mercy.  He is the fountain.

And yet so often we find ourselves making our own structures to hold water in; water that has been borrowed and is not nearly so pure.  Listen to Jeremiah 2:13; “For my people have committed two evils: they have forsaken Me, the Fountain of living waters, and they have hewn for themselves cisterns, broken cisterns which cannot hold water.”  A cistern is a ‘tank,’ then made of stone, now made of concrete, that holds water for all of your household needs. We had a cistern when I was married and lived in Kentucky; it was a concrete ‘tank’ in the ground.  To fill it, my husband had a large plastic container that fit in the bed of his truck, and we would have to go to town, fill it up at the ‘filling station,’ then return home and empty the container into the cistern.  The water in that cistern supplied all of the water to the trailer we lived in then. (Oh my...a truck, and a trailer in Kentucky!)  If that cistern had gotten a crack in it, eventually we would not have any water, and no matter how much we filled the cistern up, it would keep running dry.  It was not an ideal way to get water.  Likewise, anything we try and fill our lives with that is not flowing from the life-giving fountain of God will eventually leave us dry, parched, thirsty beyond words.  In Psalm 63:1 we read, “O God, You are my God, earnestly will I seek You; my whole being longs for You, in a dry and parched land where there is no water.” 

I know what it is to be without Him, to thirst and not be able to find any water, when all the while He is right there, the Fountain of Life, waiting for us to come take a drink, to get in the flow, to yield instead of yearn.  But in the midst of my desert when I couldn’t see the Fountain, when I kept trying to make other ways and things to hold water in, He just kept coming for me, He just kept loving me, He just kept cleaning me off no matter how dirty I became---that’s what grace is, that’s what mercy is, that’s what love is—it’s what grace does, it’s what mercy does, it’s what love does…it just keeps coming, just keeps pouring, just keeps loving until one day you finally get it: He knew me before I was born, He knew everything I would do, He knew every place I would hide, He knew every pain I would cause myself and others, and yet He still loved me, He pursued me into my darkness and He rescued me from myself, my sin, the enemy, from it all.  He destroyed my useless, broken cistern of a heart and gave me a brand new one.  He drenched me in the fountain of His love.  I didn’t deserve it, I don’t deserve it, but He loves me, He forgives me, He accepts me, and I finally got it.  I finally saw me, saw my sin, saw my shame, saw all I wasn’t, saw all I had done…and then I saw Him, saw His righteousness, saw all He is, saw His overwhelming love for me, and even as I write this I still can’t comprehend it fully; how He knew it all, how He knew me and the mess I would make, and yet He still came for me. 

Jesus speaking to the woman at the well, of Himself, in John 4:10 said, “If you knew the gift of God, and who it is that said to you, ‘Give me to drink;’ you would have asked of him, and he would have given you living water.”  In verse 13 He goes on to say, “Whoever drinks of this water will thirst again: but whoever drinks of the water that I will give him will never thirst; but the water that I will give him will be in him a well of water springing up into everlasting life.” Jesus is the gift of God, and He is the fountain of life for all who receive Him.  God can be trusted to do what He does best—bring life out of death, fountains out of dry ground, light out of darkness, joy out of mourning, and hope out of despair…
It doesn’t matter where you’ve been or what you’ve done—He still loves you, He is still pursuing you, He accepts you…don’t you think it’s time to take a life-giving drink from the Fountain that never runs dry?
 
                                                                            Thirst

It ​exists in every one of us
A deep unending burning need
To drink something that satisfies
To quench our thirst unseen
 
Maybe you’ve tried to drink love
Thinking it would stop your ache
Only to find there is no one
Who can your thirst ever slake
 
Maybe you’ve tried to drink wealth
Riches will surely be the cure
Once you’ve climbed the mountain
You find yourself deeply insecure
 
Maybe you’ve tried to drink pleasure
You’ve touched, tasted, and seen
You’ve had every high there is
Now more empty than you’ve ever been
 
There is a drink that satisfies
A fountain of life which never runs dry
There is a river of living water
Once you drink you will wonder why
 
Why did I reach for anything else?
Why did I drink of so much death?
Why did I hurt myself and others
By drinking poison disguised as breath?
 
Run to the eternal spring
Let Him flow over every part
Let Him fill you with His presence
Let Him restore your broken heart….





Written by Anne Marie Hawke
September 2020

To subscribe to my blog or to find out more about my writing please visit my website at hawkewriter.com
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    Quiet in Chaos is a blog about nothing, everything, and all things inbetween…it’s a space, an ellipsis, a deep pause. Life can be chaotic, and often needs more moments of quiet…So join me as I share and give through the written word, the place I find my Quiet in Chaos…

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